Playing Catch-Up

Back to the story....

Late summer of 2006 there was an article in our local paper about Asperger's that was very poorly done. So of course I wrote them and told them how bad it was and we were quickly asked if our family would be willing to have a reporter & photographer follow us for a month. What an experience that was. One of the best things they recorded was our experience at orientation for middle school. They had no idea that 'A' had any special needs, the guidance counselor even asked if we were at the right school! The elementary had not passed any of his information along and they were clueless. That entire school year was a battle, explaining to the special ed teacher that the novel she read about Autism wasn't as useful as she thought, having one of his teachers trigger a coughing spell that has taken 2 years to stop. Not a year I enjoyed.... but I did gain my Crazy Mom logo because of it! So there is a silver lining.

So now we fast forward 2.5 years to the present. 'A' is now in 7th grade, the middle of middle school, and much more socially aware than he's ever been. I see this as great progress for him, wanting his hair to look good to impress the pretty blond in his class is a new experience. At the same time he's also more aware of what they other kids are saying behind his back and sometimes to his face.

This school year alone he's had death threats left in his PE locker and "Smile, you're special" notes left in his regular locker. He's been attacked 4 times in a week at lunch, had his things stolen, his Science teacher was forced to leave the school after allegations arose, and decided that as long as he's not getting an 'F' his grades are fine. But over the last year or so he's been happier, less anxious, and not as prone to break downs as before.

He's also very notably going through puberty. He's grown 6 inches in 18 months, his voice has gotten a bit deeper, and we've had to renegotiate bathing terms more than once. But, as with other inhibitions and maturity, some levels have not kept up. It's nearly impossible to keep him from dancing naked in the hall between his room and the bath room at shower time. Instead we've gotten better at making sure no one else is in the hall way.

The school is still very limited in their understanding of him. Not once have they followed his IEP by transferring information to the new teachers he has each semester. His principal won't look me in the eye now and his guidance counselor is so panicked she's going to do something wrong that she's never done a thing. 'A' has his favorite speech therapist back this year though, and I'm sure that many of his improvements are thanks to her.

It stuns me sometimes when I look back over the last 14 years and see all that our family has done, been through, survived, and accomplished. I just hope the next 14 years are a little calmer!